I Don’t Know What To Do With My Life.
I don’t know what to do with my life. That’s literally what I typed into Google 5 years ago. Most of my friends were looking into universities at the time, some were going travelling and others had already landed themselves a job. I however, had no clue what to do. And because of this, I didn’t feel it was right to go to university, I didn’t want to invest 3 – 5 years of my life into something I wasn’t exactly sure on.
“Oh but think about all of the parties you’re going to miss!” some people said to me, which I thought was ridiculous. That really isn’t the point of going to university, sure it’s a huge part of the social scene but REALLY?! So what if I missed out on that?
All I knew was that I wanted to LOVE what I did. I just didn’t really know what I loved. And that was the worst part. I’m a huge believer in the notion that you can be whoever you want or do whatever you want, dream big! Go wild! Achieve your dreams! And I so WANTED to achieve mine!! I just didn’t know what they were. If I knew, I would plan out my path, figure out what I needed to do to achieve it and get to work! But it really wasn’t that simple, in fact, it rarely is.
So, back to Google, typing that in led me to this article on Gala Darling, and I distinctively remember this being the first time I had ever even seen a blog! Gala was instantly an inspiration! And me being the classic Gemini that I am I started researching into blogs and self employment and living a fulfilling life and quickly became obsessed with the idea. I wanted to read blogs all the time, especially once Gala had led me onto Steve Pavlina, who’s articles fuelled the fire in my belly even more! (Read: 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job)
By this point I had now got myself an unfulfilling full time job in a reception of a holiday park, it required sitting at a desk, in an office and I can honestly say I dreaded going. I felt like the place sucked away my creativity but, it was full time money. So I awaited my time there, actually most of the time, if the reception was quiet I would often waste away the minutes reading other blogs (which later on down the line got me into trouble! Oops!)
Then came Pinterest. And with an A-level in photography under my belt I yearned to take gorgeous images like the ones filling my screen, I wanted to save them all, and share them, and keep them. I wanted to try out the recipes and look at the beautiful clothes padding my feed. It was also around this time that Emily got in touch to ask me to take some photos of the wedding stationery she was creating. And then the light bulb turned on. Me & Emily could have a wedding blog, sharing her invitation designs and the weddings I shot, we could keep track of things that we loved and share inspirational posts and images!
And so it began. Then after a year of late nights and blogging after hours and dragging ourselves up out of bed to both go to jobs that didn’t satisfy us at all, we dropped our hours to part time. It was a gradual process, we both had commitments making that ‘leap of faith’ not quite possible yet, but when it did come a year later, let me tell you, it was glorious! Handing in those notices and knowing we worked completely for ourselves was an extremely exciting part of our lives. And still is every single day.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, this didn’t happen over night and it wasn’t ever the plan because, well, there was no plan and this isn’t supposed to be a ‘oh look how happy I am now’ sort of post, it’s intended to inspire you, to reach out to you and if you don’t know what to do with your life then listen up, that’s completely ok! You have your whole life to figure it out.
Something will happen and the right door will open. Focus on what makes you happy and go from there. As Confucius once said:
‘Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”
Don’t fret darling, it will happen, but for now, just focus on enjoying yourself and it will all fall into place!
Much Bespoke Love