Take a Break!
Have you ever been so overwhelmed by a situation that it leaves you paralysed? You feel crushed, sick, anxious, angry, sad all at the same time? Nothing anyone can say will help and it takes all the energy you can muster to even be still and just cry? I have heard a lot of people talk about this on other blogs so I know I am not the only one that feels it but when it is happening to you, you can’t help but feel alone.
It is something I speak very rarely about and admitting this to you today is really very scary but here goes, I suffer from severe anxiety. Or should I say I used to suffer with severely and then I met Jess and she completely changed my outlook on life, but that is whole different story for another day. Now and again it comes back to rear its ugly head, however I am proud to say it is very rare and in the last two years I have only suffered two bouts of mild anxiety. My last episode was just before christmas. With the stresses of money, work and the impending festive period… I was starting to feel drained, tired, breathless, sick, my body ached, and I would wake up in the middle of the night and feel as though someone was sitting on my chest, symptoms that those of you that suffer from anxiety will know all too well.
I have two main triggers that usually cause my anxiety levels to rocket. In the past my main one was work pressures, although that is a lot less now I work for myself (it certainly helps having a job you love!). The other is money, or the lack of (the downside of working for yourself, the irony!). Basically, I have a crippling desire to want to make everyone happy and if I think that isn’t going to happen, I beat myself up – big time! I honestly don’t know how this happened? I have never had a bad experience with money, I have never been so poor that I have had bailiffs knocking at the door or had to live off noodles. I have never failed an exam or failed to meet a work deadline. I just for some reason hate the thought that I might let someone down. I have extremely supportive friends, family and Mr T is amazing so as I said, I can’t tell you why I worry so much about these things, I just do?
I have spoke to doctors and councillors about this and some have put the anxiety down to the extreme pressures I put on myself to do well, to make people proud of me and to help people. Others have said there isn’t any one reason, for some people this just happens and another suggested it was down to a chemical imbalance in the brain. I am not sure how true any of these things are, but I know I pressure myself. I am the person that cries at every charity advert on the tv and every homeless person I see, just because I feel so helpless.
You might be wondering why I am telling you this? Well today I want to tell you all about how I deal with my anxiety. I am not saying this is going to work for everyone but I know it helps me. It is extremely complex and I know you are going to think it is impossible but guess what, if I can do it anyone can. This brilliant cure is called ‘Take a Break!’. I know crazy huh!
I know not everyone can just up and leave and decide they are taking a break but for those of you that suffer from anxiety so bad that it stops you from carrying out even the most simple tasks like showering or washing your hair (yes I once didn’t shower for a week because I didn’t have the energy) or going to work (I was that bad I had to quit!) then I really think it is imperative that you take a break. You desperately need to remove yourself from whatever the situation is, so that you can look back in on the tasks facing you and work out a suitable plan of action to get you functioning again.
Luckily for me I already had a trip to Sweden booked which couldn’t have come at a better time. That trip allowed me to remove myself from the stresses and worries. I allowed myself to forget about my miniscule problems and instead have fun again. When we came back I felt rejuvenated and ready to take anything on. I was also lucky enough to be able to spend a couple of days in Cornwall with some of my closest friends, so over the festive period I was really able to let my hair down and now I am back better than ever! My organisational skills have gone through the roof and I am feeling really motivated. This weekend I will be attending the She is Wild Urban Retreat hosted by our dear friend Jayne Rusby and I just know it will be the last leap I will need to take to become fully relaxed and break free of this horrible anxiety that so often holds me back.
So here my quick tips on dealing with anxiety:
- Learn to have fun again – for me this was getting on a horse for the first time in ten years, being active instantly lifted my mood. I also now make a point of taking my mum and dads dog out for walks more often, come sun or rain, no matter what the weather I always come back feeling refreshed and revitalised.
- Laugh more- watch a funny film, meet with friends, even scrolling through pinterest looking at funny pictures of cats and quotes makes me have a good laugh. You must take a look at the grumpy cat – now you have a good excuse, its therapy!
- Socialise – visiting my family often really keeps my spirits high. My mum can always tell if I am down so instantly there’s someone to talk to about my anxieties before they get to bad and take control. You cant beat having a good old natter with friends too, make a point of grabbing lunch with them.
- Don’t try to forget your problems instead focus on dealing with them. The whole point of doing all the above things is to relax your mind enough to deal with the problems. Make action plans and create goals and if you need it, ask for help – you should never be ashamed to ask for it.
Taking a break doesn’t have to mean running away, it just means do something different, try a new approach, you never know it might just help?
Much Bespoke Love